Anxiety Can Kiss my A$$

Warning: There may be…well, will be….vulgar speech and swear words in this post.

I have a cycle I go through each time I have extreme anxiety or depression.

1. It starts with the feeling,

2. Then the hope that maybe I’m just making it up in my head (I do this a lot – part of my paranoia).

3. When I establish that it is real, I try to create a plan.  I truly believe that making plans is what has kept me going through the years.  Making plans, making lists, and believing that even though it is hard as hell to keep with the plan, it will work out in the end.

BUT, we all know how frustrating it is to try to keep sane while working through the issue.

“Deep breathing”

“Concentrate and describe on an object until getting through the anxious moment”

“Art therapy”

Ummm no.  I mean, I know these methods work and they’re great at certain points in anxiety and depression.  But not always.  So, when these things just aren’t doing it, I have 2 pretty unconventional methods to make it through.

1. Screaming  Hard and loud.  Most of the time I go for a drive and tell my anxiety or depression to fuck off or tell the feeling it’s a total asshole.  I’m not normally a super vulgar person, but asking my feelings to back the fuck off a little (or a lot), helps in a weird sort of way.

2. Throwing plates.  Yes, you heard me.

a) Go to dollar store

b) Buy a lot of plates

c) Grab a permanent marker and write absolutely every asshole frustration you can think of onto the plate

c) Set up a tarp on your fence (works even better when there is bricks involved….)

d) Throw those bad boys like you’ve never thrown anything before.